David's Father, Author at Fighting for Answers

Pending Change of Placement

Change of Placement.What happens if…

David has been in a facility placement since October of 2015. Now he is nearing the end of his time at the current facility. Plans are to transition to another facility when a bed is available.

We wanted him to finish out the current school year in his current placement. So placement change will come in the next 6 weeks or so.

Interesting enough, his certificate of need (insurance authorization) expires at the same time. So this post is a what happens if… or How can Change of Placement be successful if options aren’t available?

What happens if a bed is not available and the certificate of need is denied?

The next placement is a step down from his current facility in an effort to ultimately return David to our family home. At present, while we have had successful day passes, no one in the family feels comfortable with the idea of bringing him home yet. And in reality, the last time placement ended abruptly without transition, things went very badly. It took a lot of tears, anger and frustration to get him back into care.

He does well in care, actually thrives in care. Even he is leery about leaving facility based care, which says something about how he is responding to his own situation.

So what happens if there is no where for him to go? We do have an alternate funding source already lined up for the step down facility. So that is not the issue, but if a bed is not available and the certificate of need is denied, we could be looking at another trip through 2015.

We, and I include David in this blanket statement, want the success that he is experiencing, real or imagined success, and we can’t do that without transition.

We are worried about what this means for Davids continued mental health. We can see success and/or failure depending on what happens next.

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The State of North Dakota Budget Cuts

We are beginning to see the affects that the budget cuts are having on David’s care here in North Dakota.

State seal of North Dakota (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

As a part of his ongoing care, I am trying to determine what services will be needed in the community for him to return home. I am all about long range planning.

One of the key services that we utilized before placement was mentor support. Where he spent part of a day with a mentor doing things away from the home. It gave David a break from us and it gave the family a break from David. Due to the budget cuts that service is largely unavailable for him now.

One mantra that we have heard here in North Dakota is that the budget cuts aren’t affecting people.

I beg to differ. Not only are the budget cuts affecting people, they have long reaching consequences. We can’t get a firm detailed list of what services our son would need in the community. When I ask for such a list, it is rare when I get any form of a response. This week, the list I received detailed things that we have either received in the past, or tried in the past and determined that David wasn’t a suitable candidate for because of his proclivity for violence.

So what do we do now?

I can’t realistically bring him home if there is a risk of violence. Without supports, community based, school based and home based, we are right back where we were a year ago.

On a side note, David continues to do well, but then he has always done well in care for the most part. He is showing his tendency to manipulate the people around him, but most of his care team recognizes it for what it is.

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Taking a Chance on Faith

English: “Faith” and “Hope” in stained glass, Llandenny church (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

With a lot of prayer, we are going to try a visit away from the safety and comfort that being in close proximity to the facility provides us. This is about taking a chance.

We are going to take a chance on faith that he is stable. This weekend, we are going to travel to the city to get David and take him for a 6 hour pass. That pass isn’t going to bring him home. Rather we are traveling to see his sister and give her some things that she forgot when she was home for Easter from college.

A chance.

I don’t know what we are going to feel. I don’t know how to feel about this. I just know that with deep prayer and meditation we are going to try. David had a rough day yesterday and hit one of his peers, so I am under no illusions that we will see perfect behavior. I’d settle for him just being an average teenager. It’s a chance that we are willingly going to take.

I don’t know if this will bring him closer to coming home or not. This is about a chance.

A chance for hope.

I am putting my faith in the people who have been helping him through this difficult period in his life. Are we wrong to have hope?

Whether you are a person of faith, a believer in strong positive thoughts, or someone who prefers not to share how they feel, please keep us in your thoughts. Pray that we have a good family visit this weekend. That our time together will begin the process of repairing the damage his behaviors and our reactions to them have caused, caused a rift to develop in our home. He deserves better from us, and we deserve better from ourselves and from him.

I have to believe that he is meant for more than this. And that through our trials, we are also meant for more.

Thank you.