Dad, It’s okay to be angry. Just wanted to take a few minutes and tell you something. You are in a place that is not what you are used to. It isn’t your home. It isn’t the life that you remember. The sad thing Dad? Most days, nothing about that day is the life that you remember. Your mind is playing tricks on you. It lets you see what it wants you to see. Your mind lets you forget things that are important to you. Conversations to remember. What I like is the conversations that we share. I’d like to hear about that John Deere Propane, you remember? the one that you put standard tractor tires on… Or Lance. Your favorite horse. About the flooding of the creek near the home place. The one you drove thru where the water was deep enough that you could reach out the window
Some thoughts on becoming Dad to my Dad. On him beginning to cede control of his life to me. Of having to “take” over when he is desperately trying to hold on. Mostly, just some thoughts about our time together as he gets closer to the end of his life.
Good day my friends. We are two weeks post discharge and I thought that I would post an update about how things are going. In a word. Stable. He is stable. No better, no worse. The difference is that we are actively monitoring his medications, whereas before, he was managing his own medications for most of a year, and doing so successfully. He claims to not remember most of the night when the crisis occurred. I don’t know if this is true or not and really, it doesn’t matter. Current state. We still have issues with lies. We still have issues with hoarding food in the bedroom. We still have issues with him thinking that his bedroom is a garbage dump. (although he is a teenager and I am told this is normal) We have locks on everything. Food pantry. Fridge. Laundry room. Main bathroom. Bedrooms. Deep freeze. It is