Category Archives: bipolar

update – positive news

Staff called tonight. David was in a good place to talk to me tonight.  When he is manic, it just isn’t a good idea.   David addressed his concerns. Doesn’t want to be there for another 6 months to a year. Thinks that he is being lied to. Doesn’t understand why we aren’t coming out for Christmas. Wants a Nintendo DS for Christmas.       In truth.  Before David can come home, not only does he need to work his treatment plan, but he also needs to avoid outbursts, and learn to identify when he is starting a manic episode if he can. In addition to that, before he can come home, there needs to exist, a residence that is similar to the facility he is in currently.  One that will provide him a step-down or transition to home.  A place from where we can stage home visits.  Where

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Home sweet home, again.

1176 miles. From home, to the residential facility and back again.  4 days. The thing about driving.  It gives a person a lot of time to think.  Ruminations about fatherhood, about things that a person might have done differently for David. I keep coming back to one inalienable truth. We did what we had to do.  Not just for David.  But for the whole family.  No one should live in constant fear from a loved one.  Forcing the whole family to live in such a way, at least in my mind, is a form of psychological torture.  I include David. David didn’t deserve to be constantly in trouble, constantly talked down to, or treated meanly because of his behaviors.  Sure they were relentless.  Sure they hurt, but they were a symptom of a larger problem. I pray that the David I spent the last couple of days with continues to grow and develop.  Regardless,

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My pain today

My pain tonight comes not from my body, road weary and tired of travel.   It doesn’t come from the connective tissue illness with which I have long lived. It comes from saying good bye to David. From leaving him behind in a far off place to be cared for by others. My heart knows that he is in a safe place.  In honesty, he is doing very well.  Not yet consistent enough to come home. On the other side, there is a sense of joy.  Of Gladness.  Tomorrow I will be at home with my family.  One more night of travel. Tweet #fighting4answrs