Category Archives: family stress

nights like this

I have to wonder… “Is this behavior that of a 13 year old boy, or his mental health?” See our other two boys didn’t give us all the sass, back talk, attitude and behaviors.  Or maybe I just don’t remember the behaviors because we were so busy dealing with David’s issues. Not sure if that is a blessing or not. How can we turn bedtime into a struggle for right and wrong? He claims to be funny, I think that he needs a visit with a bar of soap. Alas, I bite my tongue. If I raise my voice at all from a normal conversational tone, then he calls me out for yelling at him.  So I raise my voice a little louder in self-defense. If I call him on his behaviors, he asks if he can pack a bag to save time tomorrow when I take him back to

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It’s not our fault.

Most of my readers know me from facebook.  I am in a number of groups there, and while I would love to list them all here, it would break some aspects of confidentiality for me to do so. What I see most often in the groups that I am a part of is:  “part of this is my fault.  If I had done this, or that, he/she wouldn’t have had the meltdown.”  When you are dealing with a child that has a mental illness, things happen that are beyond our control.  Even if said child is biological rather than adopted. I tell my readers here the same thing as what I tell those in my various groups. “It is not our fault.” Simply words really.  Unless you directly caused the trauma that made your child the way he or she is, it really is not your fault.  As a parent,

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working on non-profit status

We have been mostly quiet here at Why Not Fathers.  Rest assured things have been busy. Currently we are working on incorporating Why Not Fathers as a non-profit.  We are hoping that this will open up opportunities for speaking and further engagement. Potential speaking engagements include the following topics: fatherhood adoption – both as a parent and as a child autism reactive attachment disorder autoimmune disorders – Lupus. advocacy stay at home dad using social media to connect with others who are experiencing similar events disability and you taking care of your own mental health working with the school to achieve a middle ground I am sure that there are other topics that aren’t mentioned here, so please don’t take this list to be all inclusive   Tweet #fighting4answrs