The answer should be yes. Not "how can I get my loved one help?"

Category Archives: Autism

Articles related to Autism and it’s many facets can be found here.

the phone call

… sounds ominous doesn’t it?

I just had the phone call to end all phone calls.

Out of the blue, I get a call from the facility where David lives.

I am thinking… uh-oh, David got put in a hold or something.

Nope.

Not even close.

It was David calling, “do you have time to talk?”

Anytime buddy was my response.

We proceeded to talk for 20 minutes.  My heart is flowing with happiness.  He never calls at random like this.  It was so unexpected.

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a visit with David, in the end a success

My wife reading in bed. And it wasn't because ...Mom and I went to visit David tonight.  We gave ourselves an hour.  It takes an hour to get to the residence, and an hour to get home.  On a school night, we left the other kids at home.

We were excited to see him.  He is out of the psych ward and back at the residential facility.  Since David doesn’t call, and things have been hectic with the other kids, it has been a good month since Mom has seen him.  We do call there, but he is usually doing activity when we call.   And then he forgets to return the call.

Within 5 minutes of arrival David decided he was done. He wanted to go outside and play.  Tried to compromise and when that didn’t work, he got mean.  He pushed every button he could until he got mom so upset she was in tears.  I tried to calm her, and not let her be affected by his mood.  To no avail.

It was obvious by watching him that he was not unhappy that mom was upset.  I hate to say that he had a look of satisfaction on his face that scares me.  Not sure what to think of that.

David told the staff that he didn’t want to talk to us anymore.  He said he has nothing to say to us. We asked him if he was happy without privileges… and he said no.

We talked with him about staying in school.  He said he leaves when he gets agitated.  Trouble is, he leaves whenever he wants and the school seems to be helpless in keeping him in his classroom.    We discussed the benefits of attending school and doing school work as assigned.  He doesn’t care if he has to repeat fifth grade.

So David wandered to and fro, hid in the bathroom for a bit, cussed us out, and generally was uncooperative for half an hour.  Still we stayed.  One of the staff was able to get him to come out of the bathroom.  About 15 minutes before the visit ended, David asked staff to brush his arms.  It is a therapy technique.   After that he was calm until we left.

He even showed me how to brush his arms for him.

David has scars on his hands from hurting himself when he gets angry.

As we were leaving, we told David we would talk to him soon and that we would be back next week.

We complimented him on how the last portion of the visit went.  We hugged him good bye and he apologized to mom without prompting.  As we were leaving staff told us that David had been having a difficult day.  They said he was more agitated, and that the meds aren’t leveled into his system.  The next two weeks should bring more stability.

All in all, I consider the visit a success.

In addition to Autism awareness, we will be working on Bi-polar awareness.

 

 

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Explaining mental illness to the siblings.

How do you explain mental illness to a child with Autism?

 

Rethink Mental Illness

Rethink Mental Illness (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Are you blunt in your explanations?

Should it be explained?

 

In our family, we have a child with severe mental illness.  He is currently in the hospital.  At home we have his siblings, how do we explain to the siblings the depth of the their brother’s illness?  Or do we just not talk about it?

 

In our house, everyone knows that David has needs that can’t be cared for at home.  They understand that life at home is better without the constant stress of having David here.  They understand lots of things, such as they don’t have to barricade themselves in their rooms.  They can leave their stuff unhidden because David isn’t here to steal anything.  They know that the animals are healthy because David isn’t here to poison them.

 

Yet.

 

They miss David.  In some small way they understand the depths of David’s profound mental illness because they know how it affects them.  We have never hidden it from them.  Honestly, kids know more than we give them credit for.

 

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