carl, Author at Fighting for Answers

Assumptions about Autism are Detrimental to All Involved

English: A little autistic girl. (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

By Danica C. (originally posted at My Corner of the Pond)

Something that has been bothering me for a while is someone who visited my family a while back & spent maybe an hour or two. This person told another friend my daughter was not on spectrum. Now this person has never up till that day spent time with my daughter. As far as I know she knows nothing of kids on the high end of the spectrum. Every individual with Autism is unique. No two diagnoses are the same. Just like each person has a different personality, each person has a different level of Autism. Yet she is an expert & is now telling others that I am making up my daughters autism?

Why would someone make that up?

If she were not on spectrum why do I have a 2 binders 3 inches thick full of reports, assessments and doctors reports about her disability?

How could I manage to get services from a school district & have her go to a special pre-school for mild to moderate autistic kids for two years?

Then have her in a similar classroom for kindergarten?

School districts are stingy about who they give services too and unless your child has a definite disability you do not get anything.

I guess this person’s argument was my PA did not look or act like she was autistic.

So I ask you:
1. What does an autistic kid” look” or “act” like?
2. Can they never behave and seem “normal”?
a. From what I remember on this day PA was stimming really bad. This person had made mention she was “just hyper.” Really? I have never seen an NT child stim because they were hyper.

My daughter can usually behave for company fairly well. Really the only clues would be her stimming. Even with company she can manage some eye contact for short period of time. People who do not understand autism may think she is “normal” maybe just a little high-strung. However unless you see her on a regular basis spend a little time with her, maybe encounter her in an unfamiliar setting you will not see what we see & deal with.

What I would like to say to someone; who either does not believe me or doubts how it really affects us; is unless you have walked in my shoes, spent the time to get to know my girls & family; unless you have spent more than an hour or two and seen PA at her best, worst & everything in between, you have no right judging me or making a call on my child’s diagnosis.

In case you are curious her official diagnosis is PDD-NOS (pervasive developmental disorder not other wise specified) with SPD (sensory processing disorder), severe food aversions, epilepsy, hypertonia & chronic constipation & GI distress. PDD-NOS is on spectrum. This diagnosis may be on the high end of spectrum but it is still ON SPECTRUM.

Judge not, lest ye be judged.

He flaps his hands and screams a lot, but he doesn’t mean to annoy you (learningneverstops.wordpress.com)
You Are a Unique Girl (philippinewanderer.org)
Autism the way it is (angelschoice.wordpress.com)
The High Cost of Self-Censoring (or why stimming is a good thing) (musingsofanaspie.com)
Debunking 7 Common Myths About Autism | Care2 Causes (pluk.mt.typepad.com)

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A solution to a shopping dilemma or Not that one, get that one…

The other day, I had a dilemma while shopping. It wasn’t a medical dilemma, or one about which brand of feminine hygiene product to purchase. Had nothing to do with milk choices, cereal choices or anything like that which the stay at home dad has had to purchase before. Nope it was facial scrub.

Remember? Yeah, I see the light come on. You have had that experience yourself haven’t you?

At the store that day, I remember seeing this lady holding her phone up to the razors. She was talking to it at the same time, and every once in a while I heard this guy say “not that one…”

How clever is that? Do you see it? Yeah, I didn’t at first either. She was videoing the choices and showing them to her husband. Even though he wasn’t there, he could still pick out his own razor. Oh yeah!… the photograph of the intended item for pickup on steroids! What a brilliant idea.

I know, the moms among us are thinking… how stupid are you? You couldn’t figure that out? Well, you know.. men look for solutions to the problems. We would have found it sooner or later. And I could use the excuse that we haven’t been the stay at home parent responsible for shopping nearly as long as the wife has… Excuses excuses… Tell me about it.

It was a pretty cool idea. In all fairness, I don’t know if it was the husband’s idea, or the wife’s idea. So let’s say it was a mutual discovery of both and leave it at that.

So what cool apps let us do this?

If you are exclusively Apple oriented, you can use:

If you are Android oriented, or a mixture of Apple/Android, you can use:

Either one will give you the features that you want. 🙂 Face to Face chat. So you can have your spouse say “Not that one… Not that one… Not that one… Get that one…”

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pssst. Hey you, put down your coffee for a minute.

Everyone thinks nothing of spending 5 or 10 dollars at Starbucks, or Caribou. Think that you can go without coffee today? Yeah, I think so too.

How about donating that coffee or the cost of it to a worthwhile organization? Today, Feb 14 is Giving Hearts Day in North Dakota. Every dollar donated stays with Family Voices. Please help Family Voices Help Families. [kc_background_pac_2_highlight_8 size=”26″ color=”#000000″]Dedicate your donation to a loved one today![/kc_background_pac_2_highlight_8]

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