Category Archives: Health

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Coming Home – a letter for my son

David, In less than 24 hours, you will be coming home. You will have completed yet another stay in a care facility.  As much as the facility would have us believe differently, there is no cure for your condition.  I explained it once to you, maybe you remember? I also told you there is no cure for the condition you were born with. You have something called Fetal Alcohol Syndrome.  It is within a group of disorder known as Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders.  Like Autism, there are wide variations in the symptoms that people with this condition have.  This is why we see so many specialists. Why do you have this? When your birth mom was pregnant with you, she did a lot of things that were not healthy for you, these included using drugs and alcohol.  As much as I want to say that she is evil, I can’t. 

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About that quilt…

“About that quilt.” I know, the title is rather cryptic.  It is not at all descriptive. And that’s okay.  Last Spring, I wrote about the unfinished quilt. Remember? I wrote about how in a situation like ours, we were constantly removing pieces of the quilt and trying different things in their place. Since we moved last summer, we have made incredible changes.  Our family dynamic has changed.  We owe this simply to the move into the city from our small community.  Jobs changed.  Stress levels are reduced. We now have four kids in college. So what is different? Simply put – Everything.  This time when David is discharged, he will be coming home to a new house he has never lived in.  He will be starting a new school.  He will have access to activities that weren’t available in our small town.  He should have access to a greater range

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Where is the failure? Thoughts on FASD

A year ago, David was diagnosed with Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorder (FASD). It’s a developmental disorder he was born with because of the birth mom’s drug and alcohol usage during the pregnancy. If he had been diagnosed before age 3, he would have DD services. Right now, because he didn’t have that diagnosis, he doesn’t qualify. It is their belief that he is capable of being entirely self-sufficient. and he isn’t. He may be 16 physically, but he is about 6 or 7 in most ways, and 8 or 9 in others. In every other way, he qualifies for DD services.  Except, depending on the day and his affect, his IQ scores too high.  I make the argument that an IQ score alone doesn’t indicate self-sufficiency. FASD   Initially, for the first 9 years, we fought to keep things “normal” for him, which meant that while we saw doctors, we

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