Fighting for Answers | Category Archives: out of controlout of control Archives

when it rains, it pours

Ah, the old cliche. When it rains, it pours. Did you know that this phrase hearkens back to an advertisement from the Morton Salt company? This evening, when Mom called to let us know that she was on her way home from work, David started acting up. I now know why. See, he stole an old cell phone from his mom’s dresser drawer. And he tried to hide it. In the process the dog went missing from his tie out. Which he tried to blame on the “bad people in town”. More on the dog story later. Back to the cell phone. David swears that if we would provide him with a cell phone of his own, he would stop stealing them. How do I reward a negative behavior with a positive item? When he was in safe bed he wrote a long detailed letter about why he should get

It’s not our fault.

Most of my readers know me from facebook. I am in a number of groups there, and while I would love to list them all here, it would break some aspects of confidentiality for me to do so. What I see most often in the groups that I am a part of is: “part of this is my fault. If I had done this, or that, he/she wouldn’t have had the meltdown.” When you are dealing with a child that has a mental illness, things happen that are beyond our control. Even if said child is biological rather than adopted. I tell my readers here the same thing as what I tell those in my various groups. “It is not our fault.” Simply words really. Unless you directly caused the trauma that made your child the way he or she is, it really is not your fault. As a parent,

An update on the Crisis Mode.

It is midnight here at the home. Just got a call from staff. David was taken off “close watch” at 2 pm this afternoon. What this means is that they have loosened his keeper. He doesn’t have someone practically attached to him. And while he will be monitored frequently, he won’t have someone sitting in his room watching him sleep. He remembers what happened yesterday, and is working to articulate what happened. This a huge positive for David. He usually doesn’t remember his manic periods. His treatment is still set back a bit, but he is still leaps and bounds where he was when he was admitted last January. Thank you to all of David’s readers. Countless numbers of you have offered prayer and positive thoughts. Believe me, in my mind it has helped. Words can not express how it feels to have so much support from people who don’t