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unfinished quilt tops: unraveled threads

About that quilt…

Posted on December 22, 2017 by carl

“About that quilt.” I know, the title is rather cryptic.  It is not at all descriptive.

And that’s okay.  Last Spring, I wrote about the unfinished quilt. Remember? I wrote about how in a situation like ours, we were constantly removing pieces of the quilt and trying different things in their place.

Since we moved last summer, we have made incredible changes.  Our family dynamic has changed.  We owe this simply to the move into the city from our small community.  Jobs changed.  Stress levels are reduced. We now have four kids in college.

So what is different?

Simply put – Everything.  This time when David is discharged, he will be coming home to a new house he has never lived in.  He will be starting a new school.  He will have access to activities that weren’t available in our small town.  He should have access to a greater range of supports, and all of this means less travel for the family.

No Perfection Expected

I don’t expect perfection and here is why:  We are going to experience bumps in this journey.  What life is without bumps?  But we are making a conscious effort to view the things that happen in David’s life more as symptoms of his condition and not behaviors.

An explanation.
With the Fetal Alcohol Spectrum Disorders diagnosis that we received in 2016, came a lot of research.  Number one thing to remember is that David’s brain is physically damaged.  Most specifically, the area that controls executive function and emotion response.  Meaning, those things that you and I take for granted, he will never fully understand.  Frontal lobe brain damage interrupts and affects the emotion response, critical thinking and self-control portions of the brain.  What most, including us at one time, view as behaviors, is actually a symptom of the damage in his brain.

It has been a while since we posted, so look for more things coming on.  We will talk about the decision to deny our appeal of the Developmental Disability services decision as well as many other things.  Other topics will include developmental vs chronological ages, activity levels and other things.

Cheers, Merry Christmas from our family to yours.

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