I feel like we are playing with fire here. Admittedly, David also likes to play with fire.
David admitted to that too. We had blamed another child for the small fires. David claims that it was him that did the deed. We have not had any of the fires during any of the periods when David has been in facility based care.
What methods can we employ do we deal with that? Sure we can keep all matches, lighters, knives, candles, and other things that could be used to hurt the family, but at what point does it become too much? In what reality is it fair for everyone in the house to live in an environment like this? Why should the other kids feel like they too are being punished for David’s deeds?
Safety and Security
Sure we can fill the house with fire extinguishers, we have smoke detectors and other things like places where we can lock
up knives. But what if he lights a fire while everyone is sleeping? Even as much as I stay awake when he is home and sleeping, even I can’t stay awake all the time. It would kill me to try.
Plus he is smart enough to know how to disable things like smoke detectors.
We can put alarms on his doors and windows, but he is techy enough that he can figure out how to get around those devices.
Reasons and Logic
I can think of so many reasons why he shouldn’t come home. Then too, are the reasons why he should be able to come home.
Regardless of what I, the facility, or the state want, what keeps people safe? What is best for David?
How can he learn to interact in public without being able to be out in public like his peers? What can we do to help him learn that it is not acceptable to try to kill other living creatures, including people? How?
At the end of each day, I only have more questions. More fear.