Today, we had a pretty good day. A few lies, nothing major. Right up until we got home.
Then holy hell broke out.
I have been verbally abused when I was a kid, but never like what I get almost nightly from David.
Tonight I started recording the tirades. This one lasted an hour.
To hear him talk, one would think that we beat him to within an inch of his life every day.
I love him, I really do, but where last night I was able to give him a hug and get him to stop, tonight he was having none of that.
He begged me to call the Sheriff so that he could get taken away from us and be placed with people who would treat him better.
So many other things, I just can’t comprehend why he would say them except to get a reaction out of us. I calmly laid back on the couch and ignored him, which just made him get louder.
Today we logged over 200 miles because he had therapy. Not a huge deal, but I knew that the closer we got to home, the more imminent the opportunity for him to explode. So to say I am aching from the tension would be like saying the polar ice cap is just a little freeze.
Tonight, he claimed that the reason he is like this is because he has court on Thursday.
Last week when I explained to him about court, I also told him that now is the chance for him to show the judge that he could behave. Not David, he claims that there is no hope but for him to spend the rest of his life in prison. When you have a defeatist attitude, no amount of propping by your parents can help you.
What do I do? Do I lie to the juvenile court person and tell them that everything is good at home? or do I tell them the truth?
I was a bad kid. I made a change in my life. David seems to think that I didn’t have to work at making that change. That it was easy for me to give up the things I was doing and travel down the side of good. Oh how I wish it were so. I explained to him that we could show him all of the tools he needs to make the change in his life, but that the only one who could actually affect the change is him.
I wish that he could see how much we love him. Is it too much to hope that one day he will?