We are trying desperately to change the way we respond to David.
Trying not to feed into his moods.
Trying to ignore his “little” behaviors.
Trying to ignore the digs and insults.
Trying to ignore the “affection” he shows the pets.
It is a struggle.
Today, I was in the city for an appointment. The first thing that he said was “we were doing just fine until you came home.” I hadn’t even gotten the door shut.
We sent him outside to pick up garbage in the yard, he spread more garbage out on the yard.
We offered him a snack at 8pm, and he had a fit because it wasn’t the right snack. He ended up eating what we offered.
My health is being affected. My blood pressure is elevated. My body is aching constantly. I hate this stress.
How do I separate the way I feel from the way I respond to my son? How do I become a better parent? Because believe me, there are days when I feel like the worst parent in the world because I can’t respond appropriately to my son’s behaviors and moods.
What can I do to make things better? We are still seeking a placement of some kind, but until the financing is worked out, he stays here. Every day, he asks, “when can I go to the facility?”
My family is getting tired of walking on egg shells because the littlest thing will set him off. We need to get off this teeter totter. He knows just the right combination of words and responses to make things hurt. then when he sees you respond, and knows that there is an emotional wound there, he will pick at it until you have no choice but to respond. For the most part, he only does this to me. Is it because he sees me as a threat? Or is it because he knows that I will always be there for him?
Remember this.
I said a prayer for you. I remember how stressful those days were when our son was home. It is so hard.