As we come up on the 12th anniversary of the finalization of David’s adoption into our family, I look back on our life with him.
From the first computer he ever worked on, a Compaq laptop running Windows 2000, to the many sleepless nights. I am struck by one inalienable concept.
We were brought into his life for a reason. Whether you worship God, Mohammad, Mother Earth, Father Time or Purple paint… Our family was brought into his life for a reason, and the same works in reverse, he was brought to us for a reason. He is our family. Our son, our brother. I can’t imagine what our lives would be like without David in them.
What is the reason?
Is it to teach us compassion for those with Mental Illness/Behavior Disorders?
Is it to teach us patience for those who are disabled?
Is it because we had been involved in his life before we even thought of adoption?
I don’t know.
I like to think that it is a combination of all of these things. But I think that it is more.
During the time of our adoption of David, we prayed that he would be a good fit for our family. I wonder if God brought us together because He knew that we would fight for David with everything that we are. We would fight for the help and care that David needs. That we would never give up the fight.
I think that it is bigger than that even. David was brought into our lives so that we could help him, he could help us, and we could use this experience to help others like us.
Does that make sense?
As frustrated as I have been with the lack of care that he has received, and the amount of fight we have had to undergo, I am still satisfied that we did the right thing when we said yes that day our adoption case worker asked us if we wanted to adopt David.
Would we do it again if we knew then what we know now about David?
I think so. Speaking as someone who is adopted, I can’t tell you how important it is to have a family. A permanent family. Having the number of step-dads that we did isn’t permanency. I looked to my Uncle Larry and later my dad for that permanence.