You really need to know, I don’t post everything.
It is sad to watch the gradual decline of a person’s mental health. His mental stability. For so long, everything was fairly smooth. It’s just in the last couple of weeks that things have really started to go downhill.
With children, we have great hopes in their future. With David, we have great hopes for the future. Some days I dream that I am leaving a prison where I was visiting him. Having been to prisons to visit my step-brother, I know what the visiting areas are like, so it wasn’t like I was an inmate being released.
My biggest fear is that one day, he will do something so drastic, so severe, that there will be no attempting to save him. I can’t paint a picture of how horrible those visions are, but they are my visions. Sure, I could be wrong. I pray every day that I am wrong.
There are those who tell me that I need to love David for the person he is. I get that, I really do. And believe me, if I, if we, didn’t love him for the person he is, we wouldn’t be going through everything that we have gone through in his life to try to get him the help that he needs.
In our state, the House (our state legislature) has gutted proposed amendments to a budget that would allow for expanded care for kids like David.
This means that it will be even tougher to get him the help that he needs in the future.
There will come a time… Mark my words, there will come a time when he will spend time in jail for doing something. He will blame every one. He will blame he mental health. In part, it will be his mental health, and it will be because we couldn’t get him the help that he desperately needs.
I ask that you pray for David. Pray that he finds peace. I can not imagine the inner turmoil that he must live with.
Be thankful that I don’t share every thing. It is more than the Autism. More than the Attachment Disorder. It is everything that he has going on all at the same time, in ways that we can’t and will never understand.